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2009/7/9 布布 + 开心的是Pooh Pooh + Those Happy Thing
休息了两个星期 ，今天要去上班 ，心情真的不好受 As I was on my way to work, I recall the person that makes me smile, my youngest nephew. He told my Mum that he wants to <En En>, which I call Pooh Pooh, some would call <Berak>. My mum quickly prepares for him the potty. He sat down for a while and stood up, he told my mum he is done. My mum took a look but found nothing in the potty. He continued playing with his toys, but not for long. He came back to my mum and claimed that he wants to <En En> again. He again sat down on the potty, stood up again after a while, again my mum found nothing. My mum commented that he is trying to bluff and torture my mum, making her running up and down for potty. Hahaha….He was innocently smiling at my mum. He sat on the potty for countless number of time and finally he did it! Bravo! The thought of him and his Pooh Pooh encounter had wipe away the dreadful feeling of going to work. Whenever I am feeling down, not in the mood, I would flip the photo album, looking at those old photo, recollecting the happy memories and incidents that comes with it. By doing so, I could just forgets the unpleasant or unhappy feelings that I was dealing with earlier and smiling ears to ears, simple right?
p.s. 在写这件事的时候，我还在开心的笑啊！ 2009/3/21 魔 Monster 朋友说过我不脚踏实地的生活着 朋友们是这样形容我的工作素质 其实我一直都不脚踏实地的活着 我一直都生活在一个谎言的背后 我想过要老老实实过着我的生活 也了解这个老实生活背后的代价 我一直都这样想着也慢慢的改变 勇敢去面对未来但我勇气有限啊 我觉得我的朋友多数都能理解我 所以朋友们并不是我最大的障碍 而最大的障碍可能就是我父母了 或许他们非我想象而低估他们了 无论如何我还是无法真实去面对 周围人的父母都渐渐的与世辞别 那时我的心里就浮现一个坏念头 为了能让自己好过居然起了魔心 那只是我一念之差想出来的点子 其实我怎么舍得放弃疼爱的父母 而他们怎么会有我这样的孩子呢 一个自私没人性大魔头的孩子呢 阿姨的女儿因为嫁错郎君离婚了 现在教了个新男友但怀疑患心病 阿姨夫妇俩有意想拆散这对鸳鸯 问我如何解决我说说成全女儿呀 儿女要为己打算所以成全是疼爱 生病已算不幸难道还要拆散折磨 那么我的病态如果被人们发现了 岂不是要被所有人歧视判死刑吗 我喜欢我的同类所以至今未成家 在我生活环境里喜欢同类是种罪 我也只能偷偷摸摸的混日子生活 人们的想法不像西方国家那么放 我的确很羡慕那些勇敢的朋友们 勇敢的面对自己的性取向去生活 我想我也要勇敢的去承认去接受 如果连我自己都不能接受何人能 我已开始迈向接受自己的第一步 告诉一些亲密的朋友们这个秘密 如今是宣布给这个网络的朋友们 希望你们不会把我当魔来看待了 前几天自己幻想自己向妈妈坦白 也幻想妈妈接受有个这样的孩子 自己控制不了情绪偷偷的掉眼泪 因为现在还未能坦诚的面对爸妈 希望在不久的将来我的勇气可嘉 把自己的秘密说出给爸爸妈妈听 当然也希望得到他们的肯定成全 期待他们别把我当一个魔来看待 Some of my friends said that I live my life 'without my feet planted on solid ground 'just like one of the Chinese proverb', which they were literally describing the nature of my job. As the matter of fact,they didn't know that I actually did not live my live honestly ('without my feet on solid ground'), I admitted that I have been living behind a lie. I have thought of living my life honestly but I also know that living my life honestly might lead to other sacrifices and many more unforeseen circumstances that comes with it. I have always been thinking about it and I am now in the process of making changes to my life, slowly and gradually, taking one little step at a time. I would think that most of my friends would be understanding and mature about it, and hence to me, they are not my biggest hindrance. The biggest obstacle, I would say are my parents. I may or may not under estimated their tolerance towards what I am about to say right now, and I have yet to find out, and only God knows when. No matter what I still have the fear of facing the reality, my obstacle, which is my parents. News about people's parent are biding farewell, biding good-byes for good, and at that moment in time, an idea suddenly pop up in my mind. I had this idea that my life easy without having to face my obstacle at all. What a Monster, I am. I am really sorry to have came up with that evil thought in my head, in reality I don't think I could ever part with both my beloved parents. They are the one who gave me a life, and in exchange for their good deeds, I wanted to take their life away from them, in order to make my life less complicated. How on earth did they get a child like me, a selfish and a heartless Monster! My aunt's only daughter who was once married and now divorced, is starting a new life with another guy. He was suspected of having a heart problem, because he collapsed recently. My aunt asked me if she should stop their relationship from progressing, and my replied to her was to fully support her child's decision and not making one for her. It would be perfect if a child were to be given the right to choose and decide, and as parents, a moral support is definitely of great help. Moral support from our parents is a token of love for the child. Being sick is already a mishap, and why should we break people up and make life miserable for them? If my so called 'sickness' were to be discovered, I believe they would have despise me, sentencing me to a death parole? I love my own kind, people of the same sex, that is the reason why I am not settling down like others, having a family of my own. In this current environment, it is an offense to love people of your kind, that is why I said I have not been living my life honestly, always behind a lie. People here are not as open as those in the western society, we are still reluctant to accept people for who they are. I really envied those people who find courage and strength to accept themselves for who they are, accepting the reality that is their sexual preference, and continue to live their life the way they want it. I want to, and am trying to find courage to accept myself for who I am. If I can't accept myself for who I am, then no one else would. I have started to take the first step toward the life I wanted, first by telling my close friends about my secret, that is my sexuality and now, to my friends here in the www (whole wide world). I certainly hope that anyone who read this would not treat me like you would to a Monster, or would you? A couple of days ago, I day dream that I confronted my Mum, telling her the truth about myself, and in that dream, my Mum is willing and able to accept a child like me. I could not control my emotion then, and started tearing profusely, knowing that It is just a dream and that I will need time and courage to be able to be frank with parents. Hopefully in the near future, when I find my strength and guts, I thought I have always have all those, I would be able to tell my parents this little secret of mine. And of course I would wish that they would be able to accept me for who I am, giving me some support, if not full, and certainly hope that they would not treat me like one big Monster.  生母她走了 My Biological Mum bid farewell to all 昨夜收到大妹的简讯说大姑她去世了 简讯里所谓的大姑就是我的亲生母了 亲生母亲已经和病魔挣扎五年之久了 当时因心脏病发作后就变半身不遂了 这些日子里都由我五哥五嫂在持候她 当时看到简讯的心情是很平静很冷淡 因为我觉得生母她也受够了这种折磨 如今对她来说是一种解脱是一件好事 所以当我朋友问我是否为此感到伤心 我可以坦白的说我并不为此感到伤心 是否怨恨生母她没有亲手把我给带大 也并非如此因为一直很感激她的决定 把我托夫给她的亲弟弟把我抚养成人 我对她只有感激而没什么怨恨的成分 她的离去是她的解脱我替她感到高兴 我相信她去得很安详很遗憾未能再见 如果有来世您还会是我的亲生妈妈呀 My sister sent me a text message saying that the eldest aunt has pass away. The eldest aunt is referring to my biological mother. She has been bed ridden for almost 5 years. She had a major stroke, and became semi-paralyzed. All these years, it was my fifth brother and wife who see to her daily needs and care. I was just calm and not even a sign of sadness when I saw the text message. She has finally managed to free herself from all these suffering and torture, I would think it is a wonderful thing for her. Thus, when my friend asked if I feel sad about the news, I can confidently say that I was not sad at all. My friend continues asking if I was sore about her giving me up for adoption, my reply was no. My adoption has never been an issue between me and my biological mother, I was and still grateful that she made that decision, securing for me a good family, that is her second brother, to bring me up as their child. Her departure is her freedom to all suffering and I am happy for her. I believe that she will rest in peace and with much regret that we could not meet again. If there is next life, you will still be my biological mother. 2009/3/18 我不是天使I'm No Angel 依稀记得第一次大人们说我像个小天使 那个时候已经是很久很久以前的事情了 除了那一次就不曾听人家说我像天使了 很怀念很期待现在还有人说我像天使啊 很怀念很期待人家这样说我吗？非也非也 因为骨子里我知道自己并非是个什么天使 反而觉得自己和一些平常人一样心存杂念 所以若说我像个天使那可是在讽刺我了哦 我不是什么天使因为我有血有肉有情有欲 鬼主意你可不用愁坏主意呢我也有一大萝 好事我尽能力去做好坏事我也不是没干过 我犯错我也会堕落所以我承认我不是天使 I can still remember clearly that time when the adults would linger around me telling me right in my face that I look like a little Angel! And that of course was happening a long long time ago. Since then, I have never ever heard anyone calling me an Angel anymore. Oh... how I miss the sound of people calling me an Angel! Oh, do you really think that I really misses being called an Angel? Oh no, no, it would be an insult to me now if someone were to tell me that I look like an Angel right now! You know it is not true, because you all know deep down inside, I am no Angel. Infact I am just like any ordinary person, filled with a mixtures of evil thoughts, of course there are good ones too. I said I am no Angel because I am also made of flesh and blood, I also have my feelings and desires. Who don't? You don't have to worry that I would run out of crafty plots, instead, I have baskets and baskets filled with cunning schemes! Of course I will try my very best to do all the so called good things in life, however that doesn't mean that I have not done anything bad. I do make mistakes, and I sometimes sink low, after all I am no Angel.   2009/3/2 责任Responsibility 年轻时期的愿望是拥有自己的孩子 看见周围很多可怜的孩子没人管教 甚至对他们孩子的死活不闻也不问 所以我一直认为自己可以与众不同 能好好的教养一个属于自己的结晶 好好的疼惜好好的教育好好的做人 当年纪大了愿望也渐渐有所改变了 觉得生儿育女的愿望也难以实现了 好友乐意借腹产子以实现我的愿望 我现在也只能心领她的好意谢谢她 因为已经把产子的愿望深深的埋没 再也没有勇气也没有力气去实现它 如今我的责任就是好好孝敬我爹娘 回馈他们多年以来对我的养育之恩 结婚生子之事就留给我弟他去实现 我就守株待兔把我弟孩子收为己有 这样我又能逍遥自在的过我的日子 偶尔也能享受一下家有孩子的日子 When I was younger, having a kid of my own has always been on my wish list. There are a lot of kids around us that are badly brought up, some even neglected by their own parents, so I wanted to make a difference, bringing up my own kid in my own way, being a kind and useful kid. I used to think that I have the ability to to all that on my own. As I aged, my wish list has also takes a change. Having my own kid, bringing up my own kid is merely a myth, something which I cannot see it through anymore. My friend, she offers to bear me a child to fulfill my dream, but at this present time, I can only thank her for her kindness, as for my dream, it has been deeply buried, and I do not have the courage, neither do I have the strength to even dig it out and pursuit that dream of mine. All I could think of at this time is to repay my parents, for they have gone through such trouble to bring me up, giving me a beautiful life. My responsibility for now is to provide my parents a comfortable life. I will leave the responsibility, that is getting married and bearing my own kids, to my brother. I will just sit back, relax and make his kids mine. I can live a carefree life, at the same time, feel the warmth of family hood whenever I feel like it. 2008/12/30 感恩Thankful I am thankful of all the good things in life however small it may be. I will still be grateful to the mighty one, eventhough I may be upset at times when things are not so smooth sailing. If we choose to see and handle it from a different perspective, we might end up with a little pleasant surprise. This is more fulfilling when compared to having great things showered into your life. I am grateful of my surrounding friends who have been supportive of me, regardless how unreasonable I am, you are still there to see me though my good and bad times. No matters how many battle we fought, how many hurting words we might have said to each others, we still stick by one another, and I am really thankful because the mighty one has send me all the best friends in this world to me. I would like to thank all of my friends for taking all the crap from me all these while. Should I have said something or do something that might have offended anyone, I would like to take this opportunity to say that I am sorry. Hopefully in the future I would be a better person and a better friend. Thank you. 2008/11/18 伤心季节Season of Sadness 前天手机传来了个简讯：你在家吗？我有事要告诉你。我即刻回了个电话给她，她说：莉莉你记得她吗？她住院了。已经一个星期了，昏迷不醒。脑血管爆了。我：啊！怎么可能？脑子里一直反复问自己，是恶作剧吧？有人想整我吧？可是告知我消息的人很可靠呀。我再发个简讯给莉莉最要好的朋友。简讯肯定这是事实。莉莉三十九岁，两个女儿的母亲，上个星期因为脑血管爆裂导致她昏迷不醒。我愣了一下。 不久之前也收到同样的简讯，二表哥的事件，现在又收到这个简讯，你叫我怎么去相信呢？我和莉莉认识已有七年了。一起上班一起游玩，很关心朋友的一个女孩子。工作遇到苦难时，我们都会互相照顾，所以很谈得来。自从她结婚生子后就没见面，只有简讯和电话保持联系 今天我到医院去探望她了。没什么大不了啦，住院医疗过后就可以出院了！我当时就是这样想的。上了电梯进了病房还没什么压力。直道护士小姐指出她的病房时，我全身发冷。莉莉她在加护病房里，布帘拉上了，护士说是在给莉莉办小手术。要我稍候才倒回来探望病人。我和另外一个同事到餐厅等候。那个时候我真的吓倒了。胸口感觉紧紧的，恍然大梦初醒。同事他也吓倒了！ 探病的时间也到了，我们再度去探望莉莉她了。隔着玻璃门远远的望着她。头发被剃掉一部分，这里一个树胶管那里又一个树胶管。刚刚是在她喉咙中间开了个洞方便输入氧气。莉莉她只是静静的躺着微弱的呼吸着。家人说她昨天醒来了，大概廿分钟后又继续回到昏睡状况了。医生说她只有一个星期的寿命，因为不能动手术，机会也渺小因为爆裂的血管不在大脑的表面而是里面。她天生就是大脑部分的血管有异样，能维持到三十九年才爆裂已经算幸运了。医生就这么说！今天已经是第九天了，根据莉莉家人的消息，她两天前才开始有动静。 突然间莉莉的丈夫叫嚷，看见莉莉动手要把喉咙的树胶管给拔掉，看得我的心也类似被拔了。那管子里面堆积了些血水，可能是这些血水诸塞氧气道吧。护士们又忙碌了一阵子。当时真的措手不及不知如何是好。布帘又被拉上了。只有期待一切平安无事。没多久布帘又被拉开了，莉莉的父母阿姨们都一个一个去叫唤她。看到我眼眶都湿了！我不知不觉也把双手合上，为莉莉祈祷，希望她早日康复。莉莉父母们也叫我上前去看一看她。当莉莉的妈妈说：莉莉，你的朋友来探望你了，你还记得他吗？莉莉居然点头，嘴唇也动着，好像要说什么似的。当时忍不住泪流了。 我已控制不了自己的情绪，赶紧离开医院。回家的路上心情沉重。脑海里反复的出现这个心愿：如果有一天我出事了，我不希望家人或朋友为我当心，难过。我只是一个过客。我灿烂的活过所以不必为我难过。但是莉莉啊，我会为你祈祷：早日康复回到孩子的身边，她们很需要你。 Two days ago I received a text message on my mobile which read like this : Are you at home? I have something to tell you, it's about LeeLee, Can you still remember her? She has been in hospital since last week, a stroke, and she is in coma. What! How could that happen? At the back of my mind I was asking: Is this a prank? Someone is trying to fix me up or something? But this friend of mine is very reliable. I text LeeLee best friend and the reply confirms that it is not a prank. A mother of two, at the age of thirty nine, was in coma because of a rupture in the brain. I was stunted! I just received a similar text message regarding my cousin, and now another one telling me my friend had stroke. How am I to believe? I have known LeeLee for seven years. We used to work together, traveled together. She is a kind hearted little woman. We strive through hardship together during our course of duty and definitely a great friend. We have not seen each other ever since she got married and had two kids, however we still keep in touch via text messages or phone calls. I went to the hospital to visit her today. I was thinking, she will be out in no time, a rupture of blood vessel in the brain is not a big issue. How optimistic! When the nurse pointed out to me her room, I was shocked! She is in Intensive Care Unit. Curtains were drawn, Doctor was doing a minor surgery on her, we were told to come back later. While waiting at the cafeteria, I felt my heart tightened, my body turn cold. My other colleague and I were in shock. We went back to take a look at LeeLee during the actual visiting hours. All we could do is look from a distance behind the glass panel, shaved partially on the head, tubes running in and out of her body. The surgery they just did on her is to provide oxygen to the lungs directly through the wind pipe. She sleeps peacefully, breathes slowly. According to her family, she woke up for a mere twenty minutes two days ago and went back to sleep after that. Doctor actually told her family that she will not survive more than a week! Today is the ninth day. They did not opt for an operation on her because of the depth of the ruptured blood vessel, and the blood vessels in her head are birth defects, and not due to high blood pressure whatsoever. While relating the story to me, her husband suddenly shouted. I saw LeeLee's hand trying to pull away all the tubing, it is like my heart being ripped off, when I saw that! There are fluid in the tubing for the oxygen, and it is choking her. The nurses rush to clear the fluid in the tubing, after that her parent went in to calm her down, and I could see her nodding her head in consent. My sight started to be blurry when I saw the commotion. LeeLee's parent invited me to speak to her, as her mum asked if she could remember me, LeeLee looked at me and nodded, she was trying to speak but was too weak, my tears just drop down. I did not stay much longer as I was unable to control my emotion. My heart was heavy on my way home, and this thought was circling in my mind : If ever one day, such less fortunate things happened to me, I do hope that my family and friends would not be worried and sad about it, cause I am just your passer by and I have live life to the fullest, so there is no need to be sad for me. As for LeeLee, I will pray for you : Get well soon, go back to you two lovely kids, the really need you now. 2008/11/15 没遵守诺言Breaking my promise 2008.11.13 英国伦敦的天气已经变冷了 早晨起来准备去叔叔家拜访 把自己一层一层的包了起来 穿衣服的当儿就弄得满身汗 冬天了没办法非要好好保暖 不然着凉了生病就麻烦多了 到地铁站时看见很多人排队 我也没理会反正这里人口多 这排一排那排一排很平常呀 买票时说高峰时段票价双倍 我看了看表只要多等廿分钟 才了解为何那么多人在排队 转个身到外卖店找点吃的去 吃完三明治和果汁刚好上路 看好地铁路线就即可赶路了 伦敦地铁经常延误停止服务 今天凑巧居然给我给碰上了 被迫半路下车改搭公共巴车 起初还觉得很新鲜很期待啊 后来后悔了路程耗费一小时 中途停停走走摇摇晃晃不停 这里的乘客复杂又没公德心 那学生们大声喧嚷大声说话 中年人大声播放手机的音乐 已经晕车的我又加上吵闹声 今天的旅途实在是很难受啊 之前许诺不让别人影响心情 如今又没遵守诺言大受影响 为了没公德心的大众而生气 导致自己全天的心情不愉快 不是说好了要开开心心度过 怎么现在那么烦躁不愉快呢 想了想这样折磨自己何必呢 以后出门做好措施不受影响 心平气和的走过这变形世界 麻木自己心情这世界就完美 但到最后今天还是完美收场 叔叔亲手下厨做丰富的晚餐 一家人一起用餐气氛乐融融 必先尝尽苦头后才享尽甜蜜 叔叔谢谢您了 The weather in London is becoming very cold. I was excited, got up early and get ready to visit my Uncle and his family, which I would normally do when I am in London. In order to protect myself from the cold weather, I have to wrap myself up in layers after layers of clothing! I was perspiring profusely while doing the wrapping, Hahaha...well, it is better to be protected than to catch a cold and fall sick later. There were people queuing up outside the train station when I arrived, to me it is normal to see queues here in London. Only after trying to get a day pass ticket, then I realized what the queue was all about. It is still the peak hours period, tickets cost double the price, people were queuing outside waiting the the clock to strike thirty past the hour so that they do not have to pay for the peak hours pricing. I did the same and grab a sandwich and a juice while waiting for the the off-peak period to commence. After I got my map draft out before I board the train, and there I proceed to my uncle place, about an hour of train ride away. London train services are famous for they disruptions and delays. Unfortunately it has to happens to me right now on the route that I am heading towards. We were all force to transfer to the bus services to our desired destination. Initially I was delighted about the bus journey, I get to see places which I would not have see if I were to be on the train. The bus journey took about an hour. There were many stops in between, and the Double Decker was wobbly and that makes me sick. To add on to that, the kids were talking loudly, a middle aged white male was playing some cheap trance music loudly through his mobile. I thought this would only happens in Asia, but to my surprise, the Brit are not so civic minded after all! I have to endure the whole journey with badly behaving people on board the bus, and when I arrive at destination I was in bad shape, nausea and big headache. I just promise myself not to be affected by people around me, and I just broke my promise! I let all these badly behaving people affect my mood, which leads to an unpleasant experience. I should be enjoying my trip and not to be overly concern about these 'Rubbish'. The next time I travel, I should and would take some precaution so as to protect myself from all these people, stay cool and calm moving around this changing world, numb all my nerves, not to be affected by these nerve wrecking external factors, then, I would think this world would be a better place for me. Eventually after all the hardship that I have been through in the morning, I did actually had a great evening with my uncle and family. My uncle who loves cooking, cook for us a delicious dinner and everyone is around enjoying the family time together. Thank you Jerome. 2008/11/13 潜意识The Subconscious mind 现在的我心情变得很浮躁 但是我以前还算可以控制 I have been very hot-tempered these days, sparked at every single little things. Once I let my temper ignites, it is beyond control. I asked myself if this is worth the while getting upset about? To some, I might not have the best temper guy neither am I the the most tolerable person on earth, but where have all my miserable least tolerable good temper nature gone to? At least my temper and tolerance was manageable, I would not let anyone start my fire, affecting my mood, causing me to get upset. Why am I back to the starting point, easily affected? Do I have to make mistakes and learn the hard way? Is it only then will I only be able to curb and control my emotions? I came to realize that, after the dream I had a couple of days ago, something subconsciously affecting my emotions. I am not finding an excuse for myself for my hot fiery temper of mine, but was happy to know the reason behind the fire starter! I wish I could quickly go back to my happy-go-lucky self living the rest of my life filled with happiness. 2008/11/7 你真的爱他们吗？Do you really love them? 2008/9/19 沉默是金Silence is Golden
我们周围有很多事情说了等于白说
也有很多人没试过就即刻放弃权利
所以很多时候还是以沉默对待为妙
There are instances where events mentioned are not taken into consideration
There are also people out there who gave up even before giving it a try
So the best solution is to keep my mouth shut in order not to complicate matters
2008/7/5 好听Pleasant to the ears 许茹芸：好听 “你说的话我都相信 说得好听说得甜蜜 你说的每一句我都相信 因为爱情失了聪明 听你的话闭上眼睛 这个梦多美丽让它继续” 之前本人为了发泄说了些不好听的话 也在此地留下了不好看的字体深感歉意 稍微后悔觉得自己也说了没教养的话儿 也学着和别人一样的没有文化没有教养 就因此让我想起了许茹芸的那首歌好听 是否我也要学她唱歌说话都那么好听呢 事实非你们所料因为人家又来惹我生气 厚着脸皮问我那件的衣服多久没有穿了 一点廉耻感也没有还若无其事的盘问我 你说我是否该说的比许如芸唱的好听呢 我当然保持我的教养我的文化不骂他妈 只是觉得他实在是太无药可救的可悲了 就让神救救他吧 好听吧？ Singer Valen Hsu : Pleasant to the ears " I believe whatever you said cause it so pleasant and so sweet I believe every single word you said cause I am dumbfound by love Close my eyes listening to your words and let my sweet dream carry on" I have said some unpleasant words earlier to vent my frustration, and felt remorsely sorry cause I have written some nasty words here. I feel bad cause I have said these nasty words that makes me as uncultured as that person, which mean that I am in that category of people who has bad upbringing and bad etiquette. This has brought Miss Valen Hsu's song ; Pleasant to the ears, playing in my head. Should I speak as pleasantly as she sang the song ; Pleasant to the ears? The facts stats otherwise cause the other party involve provoke me again. He still got the cheeks to ask me how long have I not worn the shirt, the one he secretly laundered, planning to wear it to the dinner and dance. He asked those questions without sign of shamefullness, not even a sign of guilt at all, so, now you tell me should I speak as pleasantly as Miss Valen Hsu sings? This time I keep my cool, my culture, cause I'm not going to scold his Mum. I really pity him for who he is and for the character he possessed. Just let his God save him Sound pleasant this time? 教养Upbringing 我还记得小时候爸爸妈妈教导我们做人的道理 无论我多么喜欢也不能随便拿陌生人给的东西 即使是东西都摆在我面前我也只能眼看手不动 如果想尝试呢得先得到物主同意之后才能下手 也许不是没给家庭的教育方式都类似我父母吧 也许每个人都有自己的做人道理和家庭教育吧 又或许人老了什么做人大道理统统都无所谓了 又或许患上了严重老人痴呆症而把礼仪给忘了 自己身上长了几根毛掉了几根自己当然晓得啦 我衣服虽多但我依稀晓得哪件是我的哪件不是 居然有人乘我不觉偷把衣服洗了准备派上用场 当我发现他装疯卖傻的说你认得是你的衣服啊 你娘娘的很对不起连你娘也遭殃被我破口大骂 孩子的错只有父母被责骂了难道还有其他人吗 我是个很随和的一个人但是我的随和有限制的 我相信在座的朋友们也会很随和也会有限制的 My Mum and Dad always teach us about social etiquette during our younger days. No matters how much we love it, we are not to receive any stuff from any stranger, even if it is left right in front of my face, all I could do is to adore it and drool over it, not unless I have the permission from the owner, I have to keep my hands off it. May be each family has its' own upbringing values, totally different from my family, or may be each and everyone of us has our own set of values, which are very different from others. May be as we grow older, we have abandon all our teaching and find them useless, or may be some of us has develop some forms Alzheimer, hence forgetting all about etiquette. I can safely say that I know my possession inside out, my clothes, my shoes, my CD, everything. My clothes may seem abundance but I still know which are mine which are not. Someone actually secretly laundered my shirt, hopefully I didn't find out, and wear it for a company's dinner. When he realized that I found out, he sarcastically said this to me, 'Oh! I see that you recognize it's your shirt". "Ni Neh Neh", I do apologize I have to use vulgarity and that person's Mum is involved. When a child makes mistake, who else other than the parents are the one to be blame. I am one easy-going person when it comes to my house mate, but there is a limit to it, I believe there is always a limit to everything, don't you agree with me? 2008/5/2 起起落落Ups and Downs 三月份纯粹是在上课除了周末收入没了一半 我家小妹嫁人后搬新家急用到钱向老哥我借 四月份对我来说是个风波不少的一个月份哦 陪着我三年心爱的电脑突然在紧要关头死机 突然没电脑使用就好像一时失去了依靠似的 但四月份假期已经安排妥当而且需要一笔钱 但工作上需要使用到电脑不得不买新电脑啊 已经省用省吃了但还是走到钱不够用的阶段 假期的机票都由上海的好哥们提前给支付了 桂林阳朔昆明丽江花费好心人提前帮我给了 收获也不少啊又认识了一群纳西古乐爱好者 认识喇嘛大师父和来之北京的小胡子小妹妹 一到昆明就受到了朋友父母的厚待了很感激 我希望在不久的将来我们还可以重逢在昆明 阳朔饭店的老板也很好亲自带我们游玩阳朔 丽江和小姐也诚恳老实让我们假期无忧无虑 九天的假期一眨眼就过去了我回到现实来了 回来的第二天却发现心爱的自行车被拆散了 前轮锁着车身是自由的只是还没被盗窃罢了 旅游后因为还没有休息好又睡过头没去上班 一串不幸的事情就像鞭炮一样连续蔓延下去 在这些不幸事件发生之时我还很快乐的度过 因为我把注意力都注重在让我开心的事情上 我坚持要保持开朗的心情去面对未知的日子 祝我好运哦...... March was completely a 'school day' era for me, with half of my income gone, everyday in the classroom At the same time, my younger Sister who recently got married, asked for help to settle their new home This April was not a bliss for me too, it comes with a numerous ups and downs along the way Furthermore, my beloved laptop suddenly went dead after serving me for almost three years Life without a computer is just like living life with one of the life support cut off Bearing in mind my April holiday, I need some money for holiday expenditure However, my job requires the use of a computer, without any choice, I have to settle for new one Cutting down my other expenses, saving for my holiday, I still ended up 'Money Not Enough' Thank goodness, all my airlines tickets was prepaid for me by my good friend in Shanghai, the trip to GuiLin, YangShuo, KunMing and LiJiang was fully paid for by a kind hearted soul in advance. The experiences during the trip were priceless, as we met the NaXi traditional music lovers, the Dalai Lama, and a chirpy little women from Beijing, whom I called 'Xiao Hu Zi' which mean 'little moustache'. Big thanks to my Shanghai's friend who had arranged his parents to accommodate us in KunMing. They were very very lovely couple and I hope to see them again in the near future. The hotel owner in YangShuo was great too, he personally took us for a tour of YangShuo by bike. Miss He from LiJiang, our driver, has made our trip less mind wrecking with her honesty and sincerity. At the blink of the eyes, these nine days trip just pass by so fast, and now I'm back to reality. Second day after I came back from my trip, I found my bicycle in two separate parts. The front wheel was still secured however the body was not, hanging loose, waiting to be stolen. I was so tired after the trip that I miss my wake up call, and did not go to work at all. These string of mishap is like a lighted up fire-crackers, spreading without prior warning. Nevertheless, I still find myself going through life surprisingly, happy! This is because I divert my attention to the things that makes me smile. I am and will approach the unknown future with optimism and happiness Wish me good luck..... 2008/4/4 美国偶像American Idol 美国偶像如今已进行到第七季了 以前我有空就看看一两集就算了 都没有真正的追看也不去留意它 这次破例学朋友们追看这个比赛 比赛本来就有人赢必有人被淘汰 有些是因为技不如人而彻底失败 有些是因为运气欠佳而没被选中 看了这些成败场面让我身感其受 我们职员在公司里就如偶像比赛 一样的有人得意肯定也有人失望 我也曾经失败过数次也曾伤心过 所以我能体会到偶像败将的心情 我也经历过无数挫折才能见天日 是这样的心态让我迷恋美国偶像 American Idol has been going on for Seven seasons I was never bothered with this competition before I would just catch a glimpse of the competition only when time permit This time round, under peer pressure I follow through the Season Seven Idol There will be winner and of course loser in a competition Some failed because they were absolutely not talented Some got drop off because they were not as lucky as others I could really feel what these contestants are going through Employee of our company is like the American Idol There are bound to be people who are pleased, and many are disappointed I failed not once but numerous times and was sad too That is why I could understand the ordeal these contestants are putting up I have also gone though numerous obstacle before I achieve where I am And it is this bonding that glue me to fall in love with the American Idol 2008/2/24 温馨Heart Felt 因为心理压力而导致我全身肌肉酸痛 找按摩师傅给我做推拿减轻肩膀疼痛 但是肩膀还是一样紧紧的放松部下来 就连要走动都也显得很不方便很辛苦 今天我和室友说好要一起出去吃晚餐 但是晚餐时间到了她却不见人影溜了 那时肩膀也开始疼痛得很厉害受不了 正要出去买药膏布贴时室友她回来了 她见我行动不便所以亲自出去买晚餐 Due to my emotional distress, every inch of my body was aching Went to for a full body massage to reduce my shoulder and neck pain However the pain in my shoulder would not go, and unable to relax A slightest movement was seen painful and distress! My house mate and I have made plan to go out for dinner together However, she just went missing when it was time for dinner At that moment, my shoulder was hurting me so badly I decided to go and get the medicated plaster to relieve my pain Just as I was about to leave the house, she came back with dinner p.s. Thank You b.s. 谢谢你 p.s. I Love You请注意 ：我爱你 昨天和室友看了部不起眼的电影 p.s. I Love You 电影描述亲情爱情友情各自一面 在电影院偷偷的流了感动的眼泪 那时耳边也同时响起无数咽泣声 这部电影它带来的不仅仅是眼泪 它也包含了开心温馨无奈的场面 我经常看到一些书信里都会运用 p.s. 这两个英文字母 但是我一直都没去真正了解它代表着什么意思直到今天 可能是我忘记了以前学校教过只是没有好好把它给留意 只晓得当这两个字母出现它就代表接下来的话是很重要 我问了好朋友后才知道它原来是 Please See 的简写 电影也看过哭也哭过了感动也感动过了我也如愿以偿了 但是事实并非是这个样子 因为我心情还是没有好转 友人她叫我去印度看一看 要我感受一下他们的不幸 好好提醒一下自己有多幸 我当然晓得自己有多幸运 但心情非我能掌握和控制 I went with my house mate to catch a movie yesterday, p.s I love you A movie comprising of love between the family, lovers and friends I was touch by the story and cried silently while watching the movie At the same time, I could also hear a few people sobbing in the background Don't get me wrong, this movie does not only bring people to tears It also has it happy moment, heart-warming and also desperate moment I has always seen the used of the two alphabet p.s. in a lot of letters However I have never really find out what they meant till today Or maybe it was taught in school which i have forgotten about it I only know that whatever comes after these two letters are important After I clarifies with my friend then I realized that it's in short for 'Please See' I have watch what I wanted to, cried as I wish too, felt heart-warming too My wishes all granted However in real life, it isn't so, I'm still depressed My friend, she suggested that I should visit India, experience the less fortunate In order to remind myself regarding how fortunate I am here Of course I know how blessed am I here, I knew it all this while that I am BLESSED But emotional stress is not what I can manage or control 2008/2/23 忧郁症Depression 我这几天的心情一直都没有好转 莫名的忧郁莫名无精打采不快乐 第一天上课人就无缘无故生病了 人家是因为没争取到而没好心情 而我却没有因为被录取而开心过 无论人家怎么替我开心替我欢庆 我并没因此而开心过反而纳闷着 决定看爱情电影让自己心情跌谷 希望电影让自己的心情极度伤悲 希望能早日脱离回到原来的日子 My mood was in distress mode this few days Depress and unhappy, no mood to do anything For no reason, I fall sick on the first day of my class! Others may be in bad mood because they were not selected However, I was not really happy eventhough I was selected No matters how others has congratulate or cheers for me I went into depression instead of celebrating with them So I decided to watch a movie to make me sad Hopefully I will be so sad after watching the movie And I wish that I will be back to my normal self again soon 电影《p.s. I Love You》 2008/2/16 新旅程A New Chapter 我终于可以回家过年了已经等待多时了 所有人都已经过完年了上班的上班去了 这个时候我才正式休息回家和家人团聚 其实我每年都是这个时候回家庆元宵节 家里人两天前已经迫不及待等我回家了 小妹发简讯追问老妈打电话来追查要人 明天就回家了家里还有新成员迎接我呢 今天也是我现在工作职位的最后一页了 度假完毕回来就开始我工作的新旅程了 开始面对人生新一页接受工作的新挑战 虽然有些胆怯但是我相信我很快能胜任 我很感激一直在身边自持鼓励我的朋友 这一次我可以正面的对你们说我成功了 没辜负你们一片苦心也谢谢你们相信我 Finally I get to go home to celebrate Chinese New Year with my family members. I have been waiting for this moment for a long time. Most people have finished celebrating their New Year and would have gone back to work, however, this is just the beginning of my holiday with my family members. I have been doing this for quite a numbers of years already, going home just for the 'Chap Goh Mei'. A couple of days ago, my sister sent me a text message asking when would I be home, and at the same time my mum called to look for her son, wondering when will he be home, I told them soon, I am going home tomorrow, not forgetting there will be a new member in the family to welcome me home. Today I have completed the last task for my position in my career. After my holiday with my family I will embarked on a New Chapter in my career, exploring new job scope, facing new challenges. Nervous? Of course I am delightful too. However I believe I will be able to grasp on this new role quickly. I am very thankful to have a group of loyal friends, who were always there to help and support me, whenever I needed one, and I can now proudly tell them that I did it! I would like to say this to my friends; I am glad I did myself proud and I believe you will be proud of me too. Thank you. 2008/1/29 注定Destiny 世上没有天生注定那回事而只是有多种选择 有些选择就比较容易但有些选择比较困难了 很多时候因为自己的选择而导致一切不顺而怨命运 我承认我也不例外但我从中学习把自己做得更好些 人生吗本来就是一个学习的过程一边试探一边改进 朋友啊我们一起努力做好人生选择让一切更美满吧 There is no such thing as destiny, there are only different choices Some choices are easy, some aren't A lot of times it is our decision that makes life trying, but we blame it on our destiny I believe I'm also one of them, but I have learnt through the years, making myself a better person Life is a learning process, we tested it and we improved it Let's works together, choosing the better choice, making our lives a better one 写这篇日志的灵感是来之电影《Number 23》而不是针对什么人 This blog entry is not targeting at anyone but an inspiration from the movie 《Number 23》 |
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